chocolamousse: (Sadyna)
[personal profile] chocolamousse
Title: Sherlock by Any Other Name
Pairing: Sherlock/John
Category: Romance
Rating: PG-13
Beta: [ profile] verityburns. This story is for her, with all my love and admiration.
Word count: 602
Translation into Chinese by Lowtension available here.
Summary: According to Sherlock, John is perfect in every way. Well. Except for his sense of humour, perhaps...

Author's note: Inspired by an image macro I posted on Tumblr. Take a look at it (and click the link in it) if you want to understand the fic!

Frankly, this is beyond me. John is a clever man. Relatively speaking, that is. He’s one of the cleverest men I know. Granted, I might be a little bit biased, but still. John is not an idiot. And yet here he is, next to me on the sofa, watching this utter nonsense on the telly, and he's laughing. Heartily. It's baffling. He says it's a classic. A classic of what? Stupid films with stupid titles? I narrow my eyes at the screen and, once again, try to see what John can possibly find funny. It's hopeless. And John keeps on laughing.

Well, I suppose some mysteries are meant to stay mysteries, even to me. I should go back to the experiment I left under way in the kitchen but I feel reluctant to leave John. The sound of his giggles and the way his face creases up make me feel warm and content. Which is completely irrational but there you go. Of course it would be preferable if I were the reason for his mirth but what can you do. So I stay there, pretending to work on my laptop while stealing glances at John, quietly enjoying his joy.


Two days later, standing side by side in Lestrade's office, we're enduring the sermon he's giving us about my... Right, it might not have been very orthodox but I solved the case, didn't I? You can only deplore such ingratitude. Yes, there was that little incident with the painting but it was a really hideous painting and its owner should be relieved that it was burnt to ashes. I can't see why the fact that it was the work of a certain Francis Bacon would be relevant. I should put Gerald on mute but John says that putting people on mute is not polite, and he likes me to be polite with Gerald. The things I do for him! So I champ at the bit and listen to Gilbert. Well, I half listen. It goes on and on and on.

"… and I'm still the officer in charge here and surely you can't have anything to say about that and..."

Oh. I jerk my head up and interrupt him in a loud voice. "Actually I do have something to say."

Godfrey looks a bit disconcerted. "Okay, say it then."

I draw in a deep breath and utter solemnly, "Don't call me Sherly."

There's a beat of silence, then John collapses with laughter. I smile proudly. This time I am the one who's making him laugh.

Galahad couldn't look more dumbfounded, which is an expression that suits him very well. I take advantage of it to grasp John's hand and lead him, still giggling, towards the exit.

As we walk back home, John beams and looks at me as if I had said something amazing. I bask in that look. I'm used to it, given that I mostly say amazing things, but yet, it's nice. Perhaps this film isn't so awful after all if it earns me this look.

"So, Sherly..."

I glare outrage at him. This is something I must nip in the bud without delay. He chuckles and squeezes my hand.

"Did I tell you there's a sequel? You must see it. We'll watch it tonight. You're going to love it."

I stop short on the pavement and look at him with horror. He giggles, gives me a quick kiss and drags me along behind him. God. This is what you get for being in love with a man who has a ruthless heart and a liking for terrible puns.

I am doomed.

(no subject)

Date: 17 November 2015 17:20 (UTC)
From: [identity profile]
"Which is completely irrational but there you go."

This was amusing.

"Of course it would be preferable if I were the reason for his mirth but what can you do."

And then it was followed by that and I was given, fully flowered, the visual of Sherlock's 'what for' face, that half-lidded gaze and elegant shoulder shrug that says, 'These mortals are beyond understanding and yet I let them do their silly mortal things for I am magnanimous.'

"I bask in that look. I'm used to it, given that I mostly say amazing things"

This is the bit where I chortle-giggled aloud.

"I am doomed."

This may be the spot where I grinned beatific and had the thinky thought: 'You so deserve it Sherlock. Ha."

(Galahad? I would love for him to call him Galahad in the show.)

(no subject)

Date: 17 November 2015 22:22 (UTC)
From: [identity profile]
I made you chortle-giggle in a slouching way and grin beatific. My work here is done.

As for Galahad, I was looking for more and more absurd first names and I chose this one because I love P. G. Wodehouse's novels. My secret head canon is that Sherlock read and loved the Blandings Castle stories when he was young then probably deleted them, but this name survived somehow. And then I remembered that we had talked about Greg and compared him to Galahad once, so I liked this name even more!

Thank you for your long comment, Atlin!

(no subject)

Date: 17 November 2015 18:58 (UTC)
From: [identity profile]
You're baaaaaaaaack!!!!

*dances round the room*

You're writing again!!!

*dances a bit more, then stops for a long cough*

Oh, darling, welcome back! And with such a sweet fluffy story too!

This is utterly adorable. I'm not sure whether Gordon would have been more shocked by the joke or by the hand-holding, but I'd love to see his face after they left the room.

It's so lovely to see you posting, sweetie!

(Mycroftian whisper) Welcome back. (/Mycroftian whisper)

And congrats on all the notes you have on your brilliant macro too.

(no subject)

Date: 17 November 2015 22:23 (UTC)
From: [identity profile]
Your comments are always so cheerful and enthusiastic, they never fail to make me smile! Thank you so much for your lovely words. Oh, also, I wanted to thank you again for your all-the-transcripts-in-one-single-file post, it was so useful to check if Sherlock would say this or that! So, in one word, THANK YOU. (Yes, that's two words. Please let's not quibble.)

(no subject)

Date: 17 November 2015 20:00 (UTC)
From: [identity profile]
Galahad! *dies laughing*

This was adorable und funny. Thank you, I needed cheering up today. :)

(no subject)

Date: 17 November 2015 22:31 (UTC)
From: [identity profile]
Hey, we meet again on LJ, after all this time! :D Also, aww, your icon! I love AO3 but I really miss all the icons you can use on LJ.

Thank you for your lovely comment. Yes, I was pleased with myself when I thought of Galahad! I'm sorry you had a bad day but I'm glad I could help to cheer you up a bit.

(no subject)

Date: 22 November 2015 15:31 (UTC)
From: [identity profile]
I miss LJ too! All the icons and GIFs. *sad sigh*

(no subject)

Date: 17 November 2015 23:01 (UTC)
From: [identity profile]
OMG this was hilarious and adorable and somehow totally believable. Loved the Sherlock POV.

(no subject)

Date: 17 November 2015 23:17 (UTC)
From: [identity profile]
OH MY GOD IT'S YOU. YOU READ A FIC I WROTE AND YOU LOVED IT. Excuse me while I hyperventilate a little. *hyperventilates a little* Sorry, I tend to flail a tiny bit when one of my favourite writers pops up in the comment section. :D

Thank you so much! Your opinion means a lot to me. I'm so glad you like the ficlet, especially as I know the first-person POV is not your cup of tea. Thank you again!

(no subject)

Date: 30 November 2015 11:59 (UTC)
From: [identity profile]
I don't know what I love most about this, you writing again, this adorable and funny little fic or that all this beautiful people meet again on LJ to write, beta and comment. *sigh* It really makes me happy! (and did I tell you that I've missed you?)

(no subject)

Date: 30 November 2015 21:14 (UTC)
From: [identity profile]
Aaaah, here you are! I thought I had lost you! :D Thank you for this (as usual) lovely comment. It's brilliant to be back! And yes, I miss the good old days of LJ too. AO3 is great but LJ feels like home. *is shamelessly mushy*

titre ou description
No, wait, that doesn't work, you already answered. Damn. I wanted to use this gif and... Rox, you spoilt everything. ;-)
Edited Date: 30 November 2015 21:15 (UTC)